Meet Michael Leahy. He’s a “recovering sex addict” who spent years “trolling online dating sites” and “hunting” for women. Ten porn-free years later, he’s now ready to use his experience to school women on how to avoid tempting guys like him!
Leahy sat down to dish his tips on finding a man online who does not bear too much of a resemblance to a sexual predator. Namely: Avoid boats, cameras, and writers.
RULE #1: Avoid finding yourself in a “skimpy bathing suit, stretched out on a boat”:
Women should choose their photos carefully, and upload ones in which they are dressed modestly or “classy,” and in settings where their true characters come out, he says.
Women may be tempted to use photos of themselves in a “skimpy bathing suit, stretched out on a boat,” but that “tells everything to the guys,” he says. “Men who are really serious about a relationship are going to blow right past you,” while the men primarily interested in sex, including sex addicts, will jump at such a profile. . . . A rule of thumb for women was that “the more skin you bare, the further you are moving the meter into the range of sex addicts.”
RULE #2: Avoid finding yourself stretched out on a boat 20, 30, or 40 times:
Another photo faux pas for women is to put up too many photos.
“If you put up 20, 30, 40 pictures, to a guy, that says you’re kind of desperate,” says Mr. Leahy. Just put up a few good ones and save the albums for (much) later.
RULE #3: Avoid men who talk too good. What are they hiding?
He also advises women to not fall for men who seem to have a knack for prose.
Sex addicts live in a “vivid fantasy world,” he says, and it is not uncommon for them to be able to produce poetry or write flowery e-mails, aimed at a romantic’s heart. Sadly, though, the sex addict has one goal, and it’s not an exclusive love relationship with one woman.
RULE #4: Avoid guys who are not on Facebook.
One of the first things Mr. Leahy tells men who are trying to escape this all-consuming sexual behavior is they must exit online dating sites and even social networking sites, like Facebook.
“Those sites are totally off-limits,” he says